For the past few years, I have been working on my first novel, Purgatory.  It was indeed a process of writing and rewriting, editing and then editing it once again.  A storyboard was created, used, scrapped, redone, then finally used to create a strong finished product.

I finally completed the product in the end of July, after having both Craig and Keith read and edit it.  I then fixed all my mistakes, which were many, and placed the final period on the story Purgatory.  It was one of my greatest accomplishments as most people talk of writing a book but few get around to it.

So I sat down and wrote, what is called, a query letter.  It was a one page letter which covered several topics.  I had to give a brief, and I mean brief, synopsis of my novel.  My 255 page book was reduced to one paragraph.  This was tougher than I thought.  I had trouble because my novel is really original and has many moving parts.  After that, I had to inform the reader of who I was, in a brief biography.  Who am I?  Well this was my first novel.  After that?  Hmmm, married, child, history, video games, Mets.  These aren’t exactly selling points; especially my love of the Mets.  Basically I spent one page selling my book.  And again, this is a tough tough process.  Everything has to be perfect.

Next came the process of finding a literary agent.  Once I finished my book, I thought, “no problem with this one.  I will just send it to the agent that interests me most and wait for the request to read my manuscript”.  Unfortunately, that was my first rejection.  I re-read the agent’s website and decided that maybe my genre just wasn’t “for him”.  So I found several more agents that specialized in both young adult lit, as well as historical fiction.  I knew, just knew, they would all say yes.  However, more rejections.

So here I am 14 rejections later.  I am a bit closer as an agent did ask to read my manuscript.  14:  No/ 1: Yes.  While that is considered a minor slump in baseball if a batter went 1 out of the last 14, it is considered a minor victory in the writing world.  Sure my hit was a bloop single.  If she shows more interest, then we can make it ground rule double.

The reason I write this is because it was an eye opening and humble experience; one which I am still stuck in.  I currently have 50 query letters out, with only one yes.  I am sure a lot of the agents haven’t got around to reading my letter, some never will.  One agent sent me a rejection letter just minutes after I sent my query.  In his rejection response, he apologized for it taking so long to get back to me and said this project may not be for him.  Hmmm, a long time in responding?  It was minutes.  It MAY NOT be for him?  It either is or isn’t.

I am not worried that eventually someone will pick up on my novel and they will be happy they did.  It is original and not the typical vampire/wizard book that young adults normally read.  I have had four people read it and heard great responses from them.

So I won’t give up and I will keep plugging away.  Maybe this agent that asked to read my book will be excited enough to want to work with me.  Maybe she won’t and I will move on.  I might be surprised and have several of those 50 agents ask for my manuscript.  They could also all turn it down and I will continue my search.  Either way, I have to be patience.  I don’t really have a choice.

PURGATORY: coming soon

This one might be a bit biased.  I went with characters that I enjoyed as a child or still enjoy today.  This isn’t an official poll so you won’t see 60s and 70s characters on the list because they stood the “test of time”.

5 BEST CARTOON CHARACTERS

5.  He Man:  This is a sentimental favorite.  I loved He Man and the Masters of the Universe as a child and myself, Keith, and Joe Dyer would watch it every morning before going to school (of course one of the worst on the list was also watched before school).  He Man was just one cool cat; and speaking of cat what about Battle Cat.  Now I know that Prince Adam wore pink and it did knock him down a few points but as He Man, he was 100% professional ass kicker.

4.  Starscream:  One of the original Transformers, Starscream was the ultimate villain.  HE was physically weak and generally ineffective, yet was willing to stab anyone in the back for his own benefit, including Megatron.  While the first Transformers movie only passed over his issues with Megatron, the second movie (and you can read my review of Transformers 2 below), the second movie actually did a good job of showing Starscream as he was.

3.  Peter Griffin:  This show has slowly become a classic after its initial cancellation by Fox.  Since its comeback, it has becuase a cult hit and millions watch it each week.  What makes it fresh is the wittiness and randomness of it all.  Peter is, by far, one of the best characters on tv today.

2.  Mr Burns:  The Simpsons has been on so long that I was in high school when we first got Fox and was introduced to all of the great characters in the Simpsons universe.  Now yes, it has become stale but it has been on for 20 years now.  This could have gone to any of the characters but I decided to put one of the men who run the town.

1.  Voltron:  This was probably one of the best cartoon shows in the 80s. Watching them now, not so much but back then, it was the bees knees.  This inspired many other Japanese shows and one day this will be made into a feature film.  (by the way, it must be the Lions and not the cars)…..”I’ll form the head”

5 WORST CARTOON CHARACTERS

There is no real order for these as they can be interchanged

5.  Gleep and Gloop.  These will offend Craig as the Herculoids were on his list of great toys but these two were…LAME.  “Oh oh, someone is falling off a bridge, Gleep…Gloop, turn into a blanket and catch them.

4.  Boo Boo.  I just don’t like sidekicks, especially one that has no actual use like Boo Boo.  Stop cleaning the dingleberries off of Yogi’s backside and get a life.

3.  Wonder Twins.  Watch the Family Guy episode where Peter forms a tampon.  It says it all.  Why create a set of superheroes without any use.  Didn’t they have Aquaman for that already?

2.  Hoot Kloot.  This show was so bad it only lasted 17 epidoses.  Joe and Keith used to watch this before school and loved it.  If you check Wikipedia, you will see that the plot is really deep.

“A lawman named Mr. Kloot and his horse (both voiced by actor Bob Holt) end up in a series of mayhem in the old west     when going after bad guys.”

1.  Smurfette:  She isn’t the worst character on cartoons but she was definitely the unluckiest.  I mean one girl and a lot of boy Smurfs…sausage party.  I wasn’t a big fan of this show, as it was quite annoying that the Smurfs switch every other word with “smurfy” or “smurftastic”.

Thanks for reading this and please feel free to post who you think belongs on these lists.

Have you ever found yourself wondering exactly what did rupture forth from your bowels as you rounded second?  Well I did, and here’s my story……

A few months ago after one of our co-workers soundly shat himself during afternoon break, someone decided to serenade him with” the Diarrhea Song”.  This prompted an argument about some of the more questionable lyrics.  So I did what any sensible modern man does when he has a question.  I turned to Google.  And Google answered.  

Here are 2 great websites that list out every lyric you ever heard to this song and many, many, many more that you probably never wanted to hear.   The first link is mainly for the “Baseball Song”.  The second link, and in my opinion the better of the two, takes a more general approach to our favorite childhood song.

Please read and enjoy.  You’ll thank me for it later…..or not.  I really don’t care either way.  Just read it, you know you want to.

The Baseball Song:  http://inky.50megs.com/idlechild/poems/diarrhea.htm

The Official Diarrhea Song Website:  http://diarrheasong.blogspot.com/

-CWD

Recently, Bishop Richard Williamson of the Society of Saint Pius X, stated his beliefs on the Holocaust.

“I believe that the historical evidence is strongly against — is hugely against — 6 million Jews having been deliberately gassed in gas chambers as a deliberate policy of Adolf Hitler,” Williamson said in the interview with a Swedish television station, which also appeared on various Web sites after its broadcast. “I believe there were no gas chambers,” he added.

If you check the site below, you can even watch him speak about the subject.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7867775.stm

Besides ignoring all the obvious evidence, the bishop blames “revisionists” for creating the myth of the Holocaust.  Is this a personal opinion or one his group believes?  The Society of St. Pius are a group that broke away from the Vatican when new laws were passed that they felt unnecessary.  Hopefully this is the belief of a single idiot and not one others share.

Even after an excommunicated religious leader within the Catholic Church stated this, Pope Benedict lifted his excommunication.  Shouldn’t the pope hold a tougher stance on this issue?  He said the bishop regretted his comments but didn’t actually apologize for them.  He is sorry he said it out loud but only because it became an issue.  The reality is that he still feels this way and was given a free pass by the Vatican.  When Prince Henry made a poor choice and dressed as a Nazi for a Halloween Party, his father made him go visit a concentration camp and listen to survivors.

When a person of power makes comments like this, people seem to listen.  When a religious leader, that people look up to, make a comment like this, people listen.  This is a slap in the face to those who suffered and still suffer today.  Thank God Dwight Eisenhowser had his men record the camps as they were liberated or men like Williamson would have more to support their uneducated claims.

Now I know that Benedict was a former member of the Nazi Youth.  I don’t think this has anything to do with this current issue.  Like most boys, he was forced into joining as schools were made to drop current curriculum and focus on what Joseph Goebbels thought would help build Nazi pride.  For Benedict, I just think he needs to take a tougher stance on this and really make a mark for his legacy.  He can never live up to what Pope John Paul II accomplished but he can try and make a difference.